The season of cider, pies, and nostalgia. The time go gather a few friends together and go apple-picking.
Or, if you’re pressed for time, pick up a bag of apples at the grocery store and imagine yourself in a J.Crew fall catalog photo shoot.
Then comes the aftermath.
Three weeks…four weeks. Those apples have been languishing. The bag is staring at you and making you feel guilty. You pin recipes for homemade pie crusts on Pinterest.
But, let’s be real. You don’t have the time to roll the dough, chill the dough, use sculpting tools to make Cthulhu lattice-work for the top of your pie.
And yet, the apples are staring at you.
STARING AT YOU.
I have a solution. The best part? It will not only work for apples that are starting to turn, but it is a way to rescue all fruit that has gone just a wee bit too long (I’m looking at YOU, package of raspberries in the fridge!).
It’s a recipe for French Apple Cake, or a clafoutis. Here is the link to where I found it.
Save your apples and make a cake. Make sure to “taste test” the rum before you use it. Also, write down the batter recipe, because you can use it for berries, peaches, nectarines, apples, pears, etc. You can change out the liquers, too – after taste testing, of course.
THIS RECIPE IS PERFECT. Do not mess with this. Do not experiment. Do not substitute. OBEY EXACTLY. The result? A thing of beauty.
I have two of these beauties in the oven right now, and an apple bag in the recycling bin.
I didn’t always. I used to be a horrible cook and hate cooking (a deadly combination that results in hockey-puck chicken and overdone rice). Maybe hormones kicked in or maybe I found someone I loved cooking for, but I’ve become an pretty good cook.
Am I an awesome cook? No. Am I the most skilled cook out there? Nope. Will I ever learn to love okra? Never.
Truth be told, I still have trouble with zesters, and I cook a lot of casseroles and one-pot/pan meals because hey, it’s real life, and stuff needs to be convenient.
I want to share my love of cooking and the useful lessons in how to cook faster, better, and healthier.
My cooking manifesto is simple: use real food, real ingredients, and just eat less.
I am an advocate of butter, steak, salads, fruit, fresh-baked bread. I’m leery of stuff that comes in plastic and boxes and has sat on a shelf for a while. That’s not to say I don’t have a thing for white cheddar popcorn, or I won’t demolish a candy bar from time to time. I do, and I don’t apologize for it. But I don’t do it all the time.
I’m writing cookbooks now in between my novels, and I couldn’t be happier. I want everyone to love food as much as I do, and I promise to share the recipe for my Marriage-Proposal Bolognese Sauce and The Beef Stroganoff of Your Dreams.
In the meantime, do as I do:
Eat happy. Live happy.
The Ketogenic Diet: Lose weight and live it up with a fresh n’ sizzlin’ summer
Reasons I wrote this cookbook:
I wrote this cookbook because I believe that there is a healthy and safe way to cut out carbohydrates in your diet in order to lose weight. I also believe there is a healthy and safe way to reintegrate carbs into your diet.
I get irrationally angry when I see cookbooks talk about lunch as if you have time to prepare a three-course meal or some gourmet sandwich that’s just going to get soggy. There’s none of that nonsense here.
Cooking for yourself is the most important diet trick there is. Even if you hate cooking, you need to cook. I wanted to share my tips and tricks for minimal cooking and maximal eating (i.e. one-pot meals, casseroles, strategic plastic containers).
Can you find this information on the internet?
Of course you can. You can find all of this and tons of recipes, too. These are not the most unique recipes you’ll ever find, but they are some of the fastest, most convenient, and generally yummy ones that lend themselves to “personalization” as you figure out what you like.
Also, I put in this book a worksheet where you can track your weight and adjust your nutrition accordingly. That’s right, when you begin to lose weight, you have to change the ratios of fat::protein::carbs to reflect it. Also, I have charts of the nutritional value of fruits and veggies so you can’t get away with just eating bacon all day.
There’s also a chart about which kinds of alcohol you can drink and how much because let’s be real. It’s summer. It’s hot. At some point, you’re going to want a gin and tonic.
One more thing, you’ll get a quick list of things you need in order to do three hours of cooking one day a week. Three hours? Yes, but you’ll walk away with grab-and-go containers for every single meal. I’ll give you the list of equipment and the strategy for how to shop, chop, and cook.
Finally, if you don’t buy this book, you’ll miss out on my fabulously funny recipe names and inimitable snarky commentary.